Before anyone gets tied up, you and your partner need to have a negotiation about what exactly is going to happen when using the bondage kits during the scene. Here are a few things to pay attention to while discussing your bondage session:
Consent.
Consent is un-coerced, non-pressured, freely given permission. It’s not that you just say yes to bondage kits sex and that this will mean you will be saying yes to everything that happens once the session starts.
There are multiple things both partners have to consent to. You should pay attention to the following:
- Determine who is going to be dominant or submissive.
- Determine whether you want to experience some sort of physical pain in order to gain erotic pleasure.
- Discuss the methods of delivering the pain (for example whips, paddles, clippers, hair pulling, slapping…)
- Talk about the intensity of the sensation delivered.
Safewords
A safeword is a pre-negotiated word that either party can use to pause, check-in, or end the scene or play. It is most commonly used by the submissive partner in a situation of discomfort and it is incredibly important to come up with a safeword before starting the play.
The most common safewords are the actual word “safeword” or the color system:
- Green – don’t stop
- Yellow – pause and check-in
- Red – stop, now.
However, you can always come up with something unique on your own.
Monitoring and communication.
However, don’t assume that after receiving consent from both sides and establishing your safewords you can just jump into it without paying attention to nothing but your own pleasure.
Monitoring and communication are of foremost importance all the way throughout the bondage kitsplay session so get used to communicating with your partner. If you are dominant it is important to check in with your submissive partner every once in a while as they can feel where the ropes are and what they are doing better than you.
They will be able to feel if something is slipped or is about to. If you are on the submissive end, it is important to give feedback and reassure your dominant partner that you are enjoying the play. Communicating to stop or prevent such a thing can be the difference between a safe session or a possible serious injury.